Cynicism

By following the trend, I watched the Susan Boyle video. I have to admit, that the people in the audience made my blood boil. Of course I'm sure the camera focused in on annoying-looking people on purpose, but ugly girls grimacing at this poor old woman's appearance...well come on. You are not so hot yourself; if you were Miranda Kerr, yes. Judge all you want. You're a goddess, and you worked hard to get to where you are; you're allowed to harbor those standards. If you're just a stubby emo teenager who has an ego the size of Africa, then shut up.

Having worked in retail for about two years, I have come to realize that people are lame. It's really interesting to see how people behave. It's unfortunately inevitable, since no one can please everyone 100%, but I have to say, some people are definitely living their life on the other side of the road.

Working in the kids department of a major clothing brand store part time in an mall designed for wealthier people (will not mention for reasons against potential libel claims), I realized that rich housewives on shopping missions think they are basically the shit. They have produced little bundles of snot and tears as well as 2ft monster clones of themselves, and now believe that the whole entire world revolves around a white blouse with a strawberry on it in size 18 months.

I don't say this with bitterness, but with fact since there had been numerous occasions where I had to call every store on the West Coast for a stupid little white sweater you could get at Walmart for basically 10% of the price. Upon failure, a condescending you're-too-stupid-because-you're-working-in-retail sort of "Thanks anyway" (if any at all) is muttered.

This one lady one time asked "Do you have yoga pants?" I put on my little smiley sales associate facade and directed her to the back. I asked her what size she was looking for. Medium, she proclaimed. I sifted through the pile for a moment, actually trying to help her. We didn't have any. "Looks like we only have small and large." I held them up to her so she could see them. Now, this is the part, where polite people say no and desperate people say 'We can try the large.' I guess she was neither and fell into the stuck up bitch category, because she said in the most supercilious tone: "Well, that doesn't help, now does it?"

I can be brash, but not enough to exceed rational thought and get myself fired. Adrenaline slushed around in my brain as I dropped the pants and walked away.

I have heard of other horror stories among my fellow co-associates. Once, a woman screamed "You ruined my life!" to a girl after realizing she gave the associate the wrong credit card card. Another time, a guy I worked with had a girl say to him straight up "It doesn't take much brains to work at [__] huh?"

It makes me wonder...was Kollontai have it right to boldly and radically suggest that being such a wife and not directly contributing to the economc in the end is just prostitution? lolcommie

Well, the lesson learned here is that it's inevitable for people to not like other people. It's inevitable for one person to feel superior to the other on the basis of nothing and everything.

Basically, I have lost hope for everything. I used to think I have social problems or that I was an introvert, but it surprised me to find out neither were true. I realized that it's just that my standards for others are too high because I hold myself to too high of a standard. It pains me to have to be a shittier person to be able to accept other people's shittyness, but that's the way the cookie crumbles.